As the years go by and the franchise expands internationally, “RuPaul’s Drag Race” has become exponentially ruthless in the name of competition. The introduction of Survivor-inspired twists fitting of the show’s “All Stars” brand have included a format change forcing the queens themselves to decide who will be leaving each week. Last year’s season featured a brutal opening episode which threatened half of the queens with instant-elimination mere seconds after entering the werkroom. And, not to mention, *that* chocolate-related twist currently playing out on “RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 14“. At this point, anything could be sprung on the queens at any time, and it probably wouldn’t come as a shock. The “UK vs the World” spin-off has proved no different, pitting nine beloved drag queens from Drag Race US, UK, Thailand, Holland, and Canada, against one another in the search to find the ‘Queen of the Mothertucking World.’
The stakes were palpable almost immediately into the premiere, where the two American contestants, Mo Heart and Jujubee, began strategising in hushed conversation. This cut-throat energy has been maintained throughout the past few weeks, and we have witnessed some of the most controversial elimination decisions in Drag Race herstory (we can still hear Pangina’s crying). Considering the show’s trajectory and the fierce attitudes of the queens this season it now seems the only natural progression would be that Ru turns the competition into a literal Drag Hunger Games. This has left us wondering, in that dystopian future when all that remains is false eyelashes, rhinestones, and Cher, how would the current cast of “UK vs the World” fare? Who would forge alliances? Who would be unafraid to backstab and outplay? Who would be the most resourceful? And, most importantly, who would emerge victorious? In this scenario, it is lives – and not Gold RuPeter Badges – that are on the line.
All nine queens rise into the arena, inevitably to the sound of a RuPaul cackle and shameless plug of his 62nd album, “Battle Ruyale”. Rather than forest or ocean, the ground is a quagmire of neon orange tic-tacs, and the mountains that enclose the battlefield are just endless piles of unconventional materials the queens will never be able to sew their way through.
Immediately, the confident attitude of the self-proclaimed ‘most famous woman in Britain,’ Baga Chipz, may prove her fatal flaw. Unlike in the werkroom, in the Drag Hunger Games there’s no chance to have a midday nap or enlist the help of your fellow contestants. I’d leave it two hours before the whole thing felt like too much effort for our Baga and she gives up — get the (glitter) cannon ready.
The other UK queens, Cheryl Hole> and Blu Hydrangeaform the strongest alliance from the start. Well, or so it seems. Blu may begin the sweetheart of our TV sets but if this season has taught us anything it is that she isn’t afraid to play with fire. Her acting chops have now been proven to us in two separate iconic Snatch Games, and by the end of the games it might be Cato, and not Rue, that she is left impersonating. Watch out Chezza, you’re in danger girl.
Much like Peeta, Drag Race Holland’s Janey Jacké can paint a mug like nobody else. Her uncanny ability to go from Meryl Streep to James Charles would definitely be a great hidden talent, as the power of disguise could see her floating through the Games. A dark horse (and a silver dress?) perhaps.
“Drag Race Thailand”‘s former judge Pangina Heals oozes winner energy from every pore of her being. In the Drag Hunger Games, she’s definitely from one of the career districts: meticulously presented, effortlessly skilled, and unfazed by competition. Time will tell whether this would mark her as a target, or, whether she could maintain her front runner status all the way. If one thing’s for sure, though, she would be the most committed to the bitter end.
Faring far better than she did on the season itself, Lemon would make it far into the games. With her on-show and in-real-life best friend Priyanka’s help (notably seen sporting a garment with ‘Justice For Lemon’ sewed into its lining), her masses of adoring followers would mobilise as sponsors. Whether medicine, food, or some showgirls-style pearls, Lemon could rely on her charming personality and undeniable talent to get her hands on any needed supplies.
The first ever winner of Drag Race’s annual reading mini-challenge, and triumphing both of the two times she has had to do it since, if Jujubee’s weapons were as sharp as her wit, she is definitely in good stead. It almost wouldn’t matter what she actually did in the arena as it seems a guarantee that she is destined to make the top three of any competition (well, perhaps apart from “Queen of the Universe”).
Re-branded and stomping the runway with more confidence than ever, it is difficult to see Mo Heart not crushing anything she puts her mind to. Her evolution from season 10 to now is a sight to behold, and stamps a firm tick on her scorecard as perhaps the most resourceful queen in the competition. Turning rhinestones to diamonds, poisonous berries to weapons, or taking catchphrases like ‘Brown Cow, Stunning!’ to the bank, Mo Heart’s cunning mind will be her best power-play.
There is no world in which Jimbo doesn’t survive until the end. A queen truly unhinged enough to gift us with that baloney-throwing alien character, and with the sheer nerve to imitate Ru’s laugh in front of Ru herself before clap-clap-silence-ing her, has what it takes to make it all the way. That is, until the announcement booms through the arena: ‘Time to lip-sync for your life (but like, for real)’.
Happy Hunger Game-ing queens, and may the Drag gods be ever in your favour!
Image Source: BBC